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Sep. 5th, 2010

(no subject)

top ten boys that are girls:

1. Ross
2. Payne ("Can I talk to you? Can I talk to you? You're making me cry, Marisa. I'm going to call Tracy, will you be mad at me if I do?" - also tied for biggest asshole of all time with someone)

and the rest are as follows and not in any particular order: Machak, Scotty, Nick, Matt.

We couldn't think of anyone else. I just think top ten sounds better than top six. And we decided that even though Nick is on the list he's really not that bad. He'd probably be number six, if at all.

What else were we supposed to talk about. It was dinner with my best friend/cousin and she was worried about what kind of conversation we could possibly carry on without awkwardness (pfffffftttttt).

Yes, yes, quite quite.

I am very sad these days. But I suppose that is what I am most days.

(no subject)

nights when the heat had gone out
we danced together alone
cold turned our breath into clouds
we never said what we were dreaming of
but you turned me into somebody loved

Aug. 19th, 2010

(no subject)

"And kissing Kent, because that's when I realized that time doesn't matter. That's when I realized that certain moments go on forever. Even after they're over they still go on, even after you're dead and buried, those moments are lasting still, backward and forward, on into infinity. They are everything and everywhere all at once.

They are the meaning."

Aug. 12th, 2010

(no subject)

you say your time has come
you're tired of waking up
don't be obscene, I can't conceive
of living without you
you say you drag me down
no one should want you now
i start to cry
you kiss my eyes
and say i'm not allowed to

it must be lonely there sometimes
let me stand by you
the honor is mine

(no subject)

who could stop me when he's in danger?
I know he's far, but I need to save him.
I need to bring him, my love.
'Cause there's no love like ours.
There's no love like ours.
Hang on in there, my love.
Sit tight, my love.

Aug. 11th, 2010

(no subject)

I dreamed a dream and time gone by.
when hope was high, and life worth living.
I dreamed that love would never die.
I dreamed that God would be forgiving.
Then I was young and unafraid
and dreams were made and used and wasted.

(but there are dreams that cannot be,
and there are storms we cannot weather)

Jan. 18th, 2010

(no subject)

"I'm sorry self that you feel this way. I'm sorry that I always hold you back. Truth is, I just want to be loved. And truth is, even if I were, I never allow myself to feel it. I'm just so sad all the time. I really long to close myself off from the world. But I want to be normal. I just won't let myself. I'm scared of everything. There's no reason to be. Just am. I'm afraid the only person I would have shared this with is gone. And he is. I'm sorry to him that I went crazy and pushed him away. But when he let me cry alone...it hurt. I think I'm destined to cry alone."

I don't know when I wrote that but I'm still sorry. I've been really great. Except for recently I seem to be spiraling back down. Really, really deep - into fathoms that feel familiar and heartwrenching.

I will get out. I know it.

Aug. 14th, 2009

(no subject)

Quick question: why am I so in love with SHINee?

And if you’re wondering at all…my favorite is Minho.

Jul. 24th, 2009

(no subject)

Okay, so, I'm really mad because I just recalled some pictures Lora and I drew in choir way back when and I would like to see them. We even put them in the choir display case in senior hall for everyone to see.

They were apocalyptic. Everyone died in fun, interesting ways. Man. I wish we had them. Damnit.

Jun. 10th, 2009

(no subject)

"I'm your knight. Yours and yours alone."

So depressed. So very, very depressed.

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